This happens when a narcissist underestimates you
What happens is that you start off feeling confident. Quite possibly, you’ve gained a certain amount of confidence in life where you feel whole, and complete, then this narcissist comes along. They sure know how to get under your skin, and trigger you. I’ve seen people who have been there and it’s not easy because narcissists want you to feel trapped and pushed down.
I remember this woman who had come into my office. She was an accomplished physician who was in charge of an entire hospital — she really had achieved a lot in her career. And yet she ended up in the hands of this guy who came into her life and took over. He was such a shyster in so many ways and had taken her for her money. He had no career and had nothing going for him. And yet, she was so fixated and drawn to him that she could not bring herself to get out of that relationship. I remember her saying to me, “I don’t even know who I am anymore. I am professionally successful, and yet, personally, I don’t even know who I am.”. The only reason why she was even in my office as a divorce attorney was because her parents had made her come in and meet with me. Eventually she was able to gain her strength and get out of that relationship…and that took the narcissist by surprise. That narcissist underestimated who she was and who she knew she had to be to break free.
So, what happens when a narcissist underestimates you? A lot of times, they believe that they have a hold over you because they have taken time to condition you…that you’re never going to leave and never going to fight back. So, what you need to do is to do something unexpected. You need to do something that’s going to shock them! And this strategy is exactly going to do that: file for that divorce or lawsuit, get out of that business relationship, talk to that person who’s going to end up being a witness for you or whatever it is that will end up shocking them. Basically, take control of the situation and don’t let them walk all over you. Not only will his will shock them, you’d even surprise yourself that you didn’t back down, and didn’t give up. And that is when they really start to respect you, they may throw a tantrum, or say all sorts of horrible things to you. And yes, it’s going to trigger them because they’re going to be like a two-year-old having a tantrum on the floor. And you know what two-year-old’s do, right? They’ll cry louder because they think that by guilting you or future faking you, they’re going to condition you back into doing what they want. It worked in the past, and that’s why they think that they’re going to be able to manipulate you again by acting like a kid rolling around the floor.
The more you stand your ground, the more narcissists will start to fear you because they’ll understand that they can’t manipulate you or control you anymore. They will soon realize that they have been underestimating your strength, resilience, your intelligence and your ability to outsmart them. That they have been underestimating your determination, the power of truth, your will and ability to fight back and uncover their lies and use those lies against them…because these are just some of the things that you’re going to do when you decide to use these as leverage and as part of your strategy. All of these, by the way, are part of my SLAY methodology, They will eventually realize that they can’t win and eventually back down.
So, that is what happens when a narcissist underestimates you. You become the more powerful one, the one that they fear…and that is a beautiful thing. They’re just going to move on down the road and find a different source of supply. When you are somebody they fear, you won’t be a good source of supply anymore. A Supply is somebody they can control.
